Staying Unhappy or Divorce Aren’t the Only Options.
Getting Divorced is Irreversible, Make Sure You Want It. There isn’t only one right choice. There can be many. Shutterstock:Orla When people think of
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Affairs | Blog | Coaching | codependence | Divorce and post-divorce | Family issues | Marriage & Marriage Crisis | Marriage Management | Mental Health | Relationship management | relationships | Separation | The Decision to Divorce
Your Spouse May Be Planning to Divorce You — And You Don’t Know It
Right now, your spouse could be sitting next to you on the couch, planning to divorce you. She may be planning to do it in the fall, after the holidays, or in a couple of years. I know this because I have spoken with hundreds and hundreds of people in that mindset, and I have been in that mindset myself.
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Affairs | Blog | Divorce and post-divorce | marriage | Marriage & Marriage Crisis | Marriage Management | Relationship management | relationships | Separation | The Decision to Divorce
5 Invisible Signs a Marriage Is Dying (Most Couples Miss Them).
Most marriages don’t collapse overnight. Marriage therapist and crisis specialist Becky Whetstone explains the subtle signs a marriage is dying long before divorce is ever mentioned.
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Affairs | Dating, Remarriage, Blended Families | Divorce and post-divorce | Family issues | Marriage & Marriage Crisis | Relationship management | relationships | Self care | Separation
Don’t Date Your Ex’s New Spouse’s Ex and Other Good Ideas.
Some things in life are unspoken rules. I don’t know if people tell us not to do these things or if our common sense does. One of the rules is not to date your best friend’s ex unless you have spoken with them about it and gotten their blessing, or any close friend, for that matter. Others are don’t cut in line, don’t stand too close, don’t talk about your bodily functions, don’t talk about your life miseries and ailments on a first date, let people exit before you enter, don’t touch other people’s things, leave things as you found them, and on and on. We do these things because we are 8 billion people on one planet, and we have to all get along. Considering other people’s feelings and sensibilities before acting is a good and excellent thing and the best way for you to get along in this world, too.
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Can Temporary Separation Save a Marriage?
Why should a couple separate, anyway? I’ve had couples come in wanting to separate who shouldn’t and couples who needed to separate who wouldn’t. My number one goal every time is to diagnose the marriage issues, stabilize whatever marriage crisis is going on, and decide if separation is appropriate in their situation. We also want to stop couples from doing even more damage to their marriages than already exists, which is likely to happen with two people who are emotionally freaking out and relying on what friends, family members, and non-therapist-endorsed Internet searches tell them to do. Separation is a big step. It is serious business, and if we decide to go that route, it will be done for the right reasons, in the right way, and it will be one of the hardest things a couple has ever done.
